~fpants

~fpants Changes since 2019-09-19T02:08:38 <p><a href="http://ball-of-feng.com">~fpants</a> / November 5, 2014 (Updated: 9.15.19)<b>GOD OF WATER</b><hr /><p>What if God is water — <br /> He's gonna be pissed about how much <br /> I just wasted zoning out in the shower. <br /> What if God is a banana god <br /> And He resents me for all the ones I've eaten <br /> And all the ones I let rot. <br /> What if God is meaner than Santa Claus <br /> And turns our souls into something worse than coal. <br /> What if God is a duck. <br /> We could make all this into a book or a song, <br /> A meeting, one day a week, <br /> A celebration of doom, the last date in our calendars. <br /> I don't have any evidence one way or another <br /> But I do believe in the miracle of indoor plumbing — <br /> A toilet that swooshes my badness into a hole <br /> And out to the ocean. <br /> And I have just enough faith <br /> To fear all of this.<p>What if God is water — <br /> He's gonna be pissed about how much <br /> I just wasted zoning out in the shower. <br /> What if God is a banana god <br /> And He resents me for all the ones I've eaten <br /> And all the ones I let rot. <br /> What if God is meaner than Santa Claus <br /> And turns our souls into something worse than coal. <br /> What if God is a duck. <br /> We could make all this into a book or a song, <br /> A meeting, one day a week, <br /> A celebration of doom, the last date in our calendars. <br /> I don't have any evidence one way or another <br /> But I do believe in the miracle of indoor plumbing — <br /> A toilet that swooshes my badness into a hole <br /> And out to the ocean. <br /> And I have just enough faith <br /> To fear all of this.<hr /><p>What if God is water — <br /> He's gonna be pissed about how much <br /> I just wasted zoning out in the shower. <br /> What if God is a banana god <br /> And He resents me for all the ones I've eaten <br /> And all the ones I let rot. <br /> What if God is meaner than Santa Claus <br /> And turns our souls into something worse than coal. <br /> What if God is a duck. <br /> We could make all this into a book or a song, <br /> A meeting, one day a week, <br /> A celebration of doom, the last date in our calendars. <br /> I don't have any evidence one way or another <br /> But I do believe in the miracle of indoor plumbing — <br /> A toilet that swooshes my badness into a hole <br /> And out to the ocean. <br /> And I have just enough faith <br /> To fear all of this.<hr /><p>What if God is water — <br /> He's gonna be pissed about how much <br /> I just wasted zoning out in the shower. <br /> What if God is a banana god <br /> And He resents me for all the ones I've eaten <br /> And all the ones I let rot. <br /> What if God is meaner than Santa Claus <br /> And turns our souls into something worse than coal. <br /> What if God is a duck. <br /> We could make all this into a book or a song, <br /> A meeting, one day a week, <br /> A celebration of doom, the last date in our calendars. <br /> I don't have any evidence one way or another <br /> But I do believe in the miracle of indoor plumbing — <br /> A toilet that swooshes my badness into a hole <br /> And out to the ocean. <br /> And I have just enough faith <br /> To fear all of this.<hr /><p>What if God is water — <br /> He's gonna be pissed about how much <br /> I just wasted zoning out in the shower. <br /> What if God is a banana god <br /> And He resents me for all the ones I've eaten <br /> And all the ones I let rot. <br /> What if God is meaner than Santa Claus <br /> And turns our souls into something worse than coal. <br /> What if God is a duck. <br /> We could make all this into a book or a song, <br /> A meeting, one day a week, <br /> A celebration of doom, the last date in our calendars. <br /> I don't have any evidence one way or another <br /> But I do believe in the miracle of indoor plumbing — <br /> A toilet that swooshes my badness into a hole <br /> And out to the ocean. <br /> And I have just enough faith <br /> To fear all of this.<p>What if God is water — <br /> He's gonna be pissed about how much <br /> I just wasted zoning out in the shower. <br /> What if God is a banana god <br /> And He resents me for all the ones I've eaten <br /> And all the ones I let rot. <br /> What if God is meaner than Santa Claus <br /> And turns our souls into something worse than coal. <br /> What if God is a duck. <br /> We could make all this into a book or a song, <br /> A meeting, one day a week, <br /> A celebration of doom, the last date in our calendars. <br /> I don't have any evidence one way or another <br /> But I do believe in the miracle of indoor plumbing — <br /> A toilet that swooshes my badness into a hole <br /> And out to the ocean. <br /> And I have just enough faith <br /> To fear all of this.<hr /><p>What if God is water — <br /> He's gonna be pissed about how much <br /> I just wasted zoning out in the shower. <br /> What if God is a banana god <br /> And He resents me for all the ones I've eaten <br /> And all the ones I let rot. <br /> What if God is meaner than Santa Claus <br /> And turns our souls into something worse than coal. <br /> What if God is a duck. <br /> We could make all this into a book or a song, <br /> A meeting, one day a week, <br /> A celebration of doom, the last date in our calendars. <br /> I don't have any evidence one way or another <br /> But I do believe in the miracle of indoor plumbing — <br /> A toilet that swooshes my badness into a hole <br /> And out to the ocean. <br /> And I have just enough faith <br /> To fear all of this.<p>What if God is water — <br /> He's gonna be pissed about how much <br /> I just wasted zoning out in the shower. <br /> What if God is a banana god <br /> And He resents me for all the ones I've eaten <br /> And all the ones I let rot. <br /> What if God is meaner than Santa Claus <br /> And turns our souls into something worse than coal. <br /> What if God is a duck. <br /> We could make all this into a book or a song, <br /> A meeting, one day a week, <br /> A celebration of doom, the last date in our calendars. <br /> I don't have any evidence one way or another <br /> But I do believe in the miracle of indoor plumbing — <br /> A toilet that swooshes my badness into a hole <br /> And out to the ocean. <br /> And I have just enough faith <br /> To fear all of this.<p>What if God is water — <br /> He's gonna be pissed about how much <br /> I just wasted zoning out in the shower. <br /> What if God is a banana god <br /> And He resents me for all the ones I've eaten <br /> And all the ones I let rot. <br /> What if God is meaner than Santa Claus <br /> And turns our souls into something worse than coal. <br /> What if God is a duck. <br /> We could make all this into a book or a song, <br /> A meeting, one day a week, <br /> A celebration of doom, the last date in our calendars. <br /> I don't have any evidence one way or another <br /> But I do believe in the miracle of indoor plumbing — <br /> A toilet that swooshes my badness into a hole <br /> And out to the ocean. <br /> And I have just enough faith <br /> To fear all of this. fpants@relvokcor.xyz 796d6ebf-e0a6-334b-a9c0-f46170736f72 2019-09-19T02:08:38Z 2019-09-19T02:08:38Z Changes since 2014-12-07T14:36:02 <p>What if God is water — <br /> He's gonna be pissed about how long <br /> I just zoned out in the shower. <br /> What if God is a banana god <br /> And He resents me for all the ones I've eaten <br /> And all the ones I let rot. <br /> What if God is meaner than Santa Claus <br /> And turns our souls into coal. <br /> What if God is a duck. <br /> We could make all this into a book (or a song), <br /> A meeting, one day a week, <br /> A celebration of doom, the last date in our calendars. <br /> We don't have evidence <br /> But we do have the miracle of indoor plumbing — <br /> A toilet that swooshes my badness into a hole <br /> And into the ocean. <br /> And we have faith enough <br /> To fear all of it. fpants@relvokcor.xyz 1e5a920a-bd82-3951-a188-30f7c9aa7a94 2014-12-07T14:36:02Z 2014-12-07T14:36:02Z